The trend today is that only you are responsible for your own happiness: You must see the possibilities, think positively, be a winner in your own life. But not all patients are "winners", even if they use mental techniques.

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This is what Torgeir W. Skancke writes in a post on Aftenposten.no which has been shared a lot on social media. The post has great relevance for people with different life challenges and life crises - in the face of the belief in a "quick fix" in the face of deep life challenges. 

In the post, Skancke himself looks back to a very difficult time in his own and his family's life - and how the self-help literature dramatically fell short in such a situation:

At this time, family life was an extreme life that was about survival. We knew that our boy, who had been seriously ill for 15 years, was about to die.

It was a desperate situation, where in addition to having the boy in ordinary medical treatment, they also tried alternative treatments - and resorted to self-help literature. In this literature he came across many promises of good lives and quick solutions to great problems; as in the example "Be happy in 10 minutes."

Skancke also talks about similar experiences from attending various motivational seminars, including from a motivator from the Olympiatoppen (i.e., a Norwegian organization for elite sporters), who emphasized the importance of "enthusiasm and excitement." Skancke writes about this:

I have little reason to doubt the results of their results (i.e., Olympiatoppen). I also have great faith in the importance of the power of thought. There is also nothing wrong with getting refills in everyday life. The problem starts when the motivators, mental trainers and coaches move from sports and business to people in life crisis.

Even in an acute illness situation, you should think like a top athlete: You should win!

Torgeir W. Skancke expresses concern about simple self-help solutions in the face of deep life problems, and he points out that the trend today is that only you are responsible for your own happiness.

He writes:

For most people, there is a lot to be gained from self-help techniques in everyday life: You can get out of the role as a victim, dampen thoughts that "fate" is after you, and increase the belief in your own abilities.

 But he also emphasizes:

To what extent does ourr high-performance society also allow for failure? Because not all patients are winners, even if they use mental techniques.

 

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Written by

ove heradstveit

Ove Heradstveit

Psychologist, specialist in clinical community psychology. PhD.
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